5 August 2013

Prospects For Play Poor But Prospects For Tripe Excellent

The prospects for play at the Test Match today may be poor but the prospects for tripe are excellent. Sales of tripe have gone through the roof after David ‘Bumble’ Lloyd read out a letter from Tripe Marketing Board chairman Sir Norman Wrassle during his Test Match commentary on Sky Cricket and mentioned it in his column in the Daily Mail.

Chairman Sir Norman Wrassle said, “We appear to have turned a corner and it’s all down to David Lloyd. Tripe sales have been falling since 1952 but retailers have reported a huge increase in sales over the weekend. But we mustn’t get carried away as this could well be a spike.  Nevertheless, I am cautiously optimistic.

“As a token of my appreciation I have arranged for a hamper containing the finest Lancashire delicacies to be delivered by special courier to Mr Lloyd at Old Trafford today at a special 10% discount price, together with a personal letter of thanks.

"If Mr Lloyd needs work during the close season, there's a sales job waiting for him here at the Tripe Marketing Board."

TMB Books, the Tripe Marketing Board’s publishing arm, has also reported a surge in sales of Dr Derek J Ripley’s seminal The Lost Films of Twentieth Century Spatchcock with at least two copies sold over the weekend.

Due to unprecedented media interest in Sir Norman's letter last week, he has agreed that it can be reproduced in full in the Tripe Marketing Board's 2014 Diary, due for publication shortly.

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